Don’t look at me. I’m Hideous.

As some of you may know I have some body image issues. And hey, who doesn’t these days? But I try not to let them run my life ALL the time. It is difficult to ignore however when a picture like this is taken of you.

I mean Jesus Christ! I look like a sweat machine that spent its entire life’s savings made producing sweat to buy a cheap suit and a pound of meth. I look like the guy that would make Dahmer dive off the elevator at the last minute. I look like a skeleton that has been dipped in layers upon layers of pure butter and cream cheese then lightly sprinkled with cinnamon and dirt which is not made up entirely of but does contain a large amount of dried powdered human feces. It looks like I slid under the grease truck at dumpin’ time.

But you know, whatever. I had a pretty good time at the Snap 2 show. I’ll talk about the old ladies I wanted to do it with that were there tomorrow.

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3 Responses to “Don’t look at me. I’m Hideous.”

  1. I’ve taken to growing an unkempt beard. I figure it will distract people from the rest.

    Have you considered turning his hatred and talent for description outward at celebrities? That seems to be profitable.

    Also, I think you look distinguished in the shot. Distinguished and dangerous.

  2. And by “his” I mean “this.”

  3. Peace thats phuc–g hilarious Im with you kid

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